Dec 23, 2006

If You Have Bank...

...and want to majorly impress someone, here are a trio of fab options.

Is she a whiz in the kitchen? A total foodie? An attractive version of Martha Stewart? Or, better still, is she Giada De Laurentiis? Splurge on this great kitchenware necklace. So cute, without being cloying. Very expensive.

If you simply want to demonstrate how luxe your table setting can get, spring for this set of pagoda salt and pepper shakers. 'Tis the season to let your seasonings be decadent.

And, for the pièce de résistance, how better to fight the chill in your swank modernist apartment (or the swank moderist apartment of your dreams) than by installing this Blomus Chimo fireplace? No chimmney required, runs on ethanol, and very space-efficient. Not to mention totally rad.

Dec 22, 2006

Wii-alistic Expectations

Okay, let's face it: You want a Wii for Christmas. But, what with the shortages and the lines, it's a pain in the glayven. So you're not getting a Wii for Christmas. (And definitely not a PS3, but that's no great loss—it costs $600, weighs 17 pounds, and looks like a George Foreman grill.) To numb the pain of a Wii-less holiday, get a DS Lite (in either polar white or onyx black), which is awfully handy for when you have to take three flights in one day. And, in preparation for your eventual ownership of a Wii, get this shirt.

Dec 21, 2006

Stuff It—In Your Stocking, Obviously

Soap Rocks are a little bit funky, a little bit gorgeous.

Okay, neither of these is very exciting, but they're both pretty useful. The Travel Gal Pal is a portable spongy-type thing that removes deodorant or other such schmutz from your clothing. Meanwhile, for certain ladies (my grandmother, for starters) who tend to lug around massive purses full of everything short of the kitchen sink, the Purse Pal clip-on purse light might just be a tiny godsend.

These little keyboard brushes would make great stocking stuffers, except that I haven't a clue as to how much they cost and/or how to purchase them. (It's a Japanese site.) Maybe eBay? Or maybe you're lucky and have a friend who lives in Japan?

These snarky buttons come in a four-pack: the little box of lies.

Socks. Socks are always great. These nice, warm, colorful cotton tights are extremely good wintertime options, too.

Dec 18, 2006

Have a Very British Christmas

Here's one for all the expats (or anyone with a fondess for English sweets). I found a site that will, quite cheaply, ship to the U.S. Thus you can buy some mince pies and a Christmas pudding and have a proper holiday feast.
Incidentally, should you be in the market for mince pies, here's a handy guide to some of the common brands.

Dec 15, 2006

Oh So Write

Even if it's just an occasional postcard and the rent check, everyone writes. Of course, some of us enjoy writing more than others. Some of us still hold our pens wrong and therefore particularly appreciate comfy writing implements. Some of us absolutely need a pen on us at all times, just in case we should have Very Important Thoughts and have to make some impromptu Very Important Lists.

Needless to say, pens can make great presents. (Okay, I know some of you just tuned me out. Bear with me, though.) Anyone who's all about technologically advanced gizmos (or even just elegant design) will appreciate a Fisher Space Pen. Astronauts use them 'cause they can write in space. They're amazing. Seriously, I once wrote on a wet glass with a Space Pen. That rocks. Both the chrome bullet and the matte black bullet (sort of the Darth Vader of Space Pens) are as sleek and sexy as a pen can get. Incidentally, make sure you buy the version that comes with a detachable clip. The pens aren't quite as simplistically stunning with the clips attached, but get used to losing them if you don't. They're slippery little buggers. (As Afshin—now on his fifth Space Pen—can attest.)

Though they're not as technomalogically forward as the Space Pens, Sensa pens are great. I have a light amethyst one that I've been using since...middle school, actually. Damn. Admittedly, I have replaced the ink refill, but that's to be expected. Not only are they attractive, well-made pens (that are available in an array of colors), but they're exceptionally comfortable. There's a little squishy gel bit around the barrel that makes writing so much less painful if you a) hold your pen incorrectly or b) have to write for an extended period of time. I'm not sure precisely what the difference is between these two types of Sensas, but this is the less expensive Cloud 9 range and this is the rather more expensive Stylist range. If you really want to splash out, go for the gold-plated, platinum-plated, or titanium models.

Dec 13, 2006

Since We're Discussing Shoes...

...I do have some shoe-related suggestions for the holiday gift guide. These earrings are so cute—check out the heels, which double as the earring backings. And there are matching necklaces! I'm going to drop dead from a cuteness overdose.

Better Than Blue Suede Shoes...

...are these purple suede boots. Okay, I know this isn't technically an entry for the holiday gift guide (unless you're looking for suggestions for me), but they're too fabulous not to mention. (And I'm very picky about boots.) They remind me so much of a pair of purple Chinese Laundry boots that I had and adored but which eventually fell apart. I killed them with love. I'm still not sure that I ever threw them away, even though they're clearly unwearable.

Other (Inferior) Gift Guides

Boy, both the New York Times gift guide and that of New York magazine (which is usually chock-full of good, albeit expensive, suggestions) are remarkably disappointing this year.
Oddly enough, after I wrote the preceding sentence, I read Slate's guide to gift guides, which gave its highest rating to New York mag's guide. I wonder how dreadful the others must me...

Dec 12, 2006

Merry Boozemas!

If you plan on having a party this holiday season, you might take a look at this wine-related accessory sets of a silver bottle stopper, bottle cover, and wine glass charms. Personally, I think it'd be overkill to buy all of them (too matchy-matchy), but I think the bottle stopper alone would be cool. Not to mention vaguely reminiscent of a popping Champagne bottle.

Just as entertainingly useless is the DollyPop bottle cover. I'm not sure where you can buy it and, quite frankly, I wouldn't recommend it. I don't need a sheepskin to cover my wine bottle, thank you. However, I think it looks nifty and is a great way to cover up a less-than-attractive bottle. So go the crafty DIY route: Buy a cheap wine bag (or fabric if you're particularly handy and want to whip one up yourself) and a feather boa. Swirl the boa around the bag and baste it in place. I'd also suggest scrounging around a hardware store for some sort of rubber/plastic piece to put at the top of the bag to stop drips and avoid staining your decorative new wine bag.

While we're on the topic of wine, allow me to plug this Pewter Octopus Wine Aerator. If you're the sort of person who actually decants your wine, you might find this useful. I don't. Decant, I mean. So it would be of no use to me. Yet I can appreciate the concept, and I think it's generally interesting-looking. Weird, yet strangely elegant.

I know they're a bit blingy, but these sparkle cocktail glasses are fun and festive. And remind me of a pair of Champagne flutes I once customized. Good for your girlfriend who's single and fabulous.

On the other hand, this flask-in-a-Bible is good for humor and Simpsons-related value only. Mmm, sacrelicious.

Lest you think I'm forgetting the most important component of Boozemas (i.e., the booze), I present this trio of Glenrothes Scotch whiskies. Excellent brand, usually rather expensive, totally worth getting for the lush you love.

Dec 11, 2006

Deck the Kitchen

Best. Brownie pan. Ever. With the crunchy edges and the chewy middles and the HOYven MAYven.

Say you're not a fan of gingerbread cookies (though I can't imagine why not), but you love the festive little gingerbread people that seem to pop up and multiply every holiday season. This silicone gingerbread man–shaped muffin pan has you sorted.

Incidentally, if you're going to whip up such treats, you might want an apron. And you couldn't find a more retro-licious (yet eminently practical, as it wipes clean) apron than one of these.

And if you've been a very good little boy or girl, maybe you'll get a Vita-Mix, which is like the Porsche of blenders. Even the basic model is apparently excellent, but this one is unfuckingbelievable.

Dec 8, 2006

Let It Snow

Even in the warmest of climes, you can host an in-home snowstorm with these snowflake wall decals and great felt flurry runner, trivets, and coasters.

Kiddie Crafts

It's always nice to buy handmade and/or one-of-a-kind goods when possible. It just makes gifts that much more special. With that sentiment in mind, peruse the soft, squishy offerings in two Etsy shops: Fantastic Toys and Making Mitsi. While I'm not equally tickled by all of their products, some of the little felt creatures are awfully cute.

Fabulously Frozen

Even though it never gets that cold in the Bay Area, if I bought some of these goodies, I could create my own winter wonderland. I'd be slightly delusional, but that's par for the course with me.

I love these Cube Tube Vases—the idea of flowers sprouting from ice is inherently picturesque.

Despite their somewhat gay name, these Frozen Moment picture frames are pretty cool. (Hah! I just made an unintentional pun. Not a very good one, though.)

I've had my eye on this ice bracelet for a while now. Of course, if you wear icy jewelry, does that mean you're frigid? Hmmm....

These Verner Panton Dodecahedron candleholders are appropriately chilly and crystalish, but for a less expensive option, go with the Kosta Boda Snowball Votives. Not only are they significantly cheaper, I think they're actually prettier. They really do look like chunks of ice in person—you half expect them to melt when you light the candles.

And I know I've mentioned it before, but I still think this Ice Cubed ice bucket is fantastic.

Kern with Pride

Just one little suggestion for today. (Hey, it's been a busy day. And the mags come first, since they actually pay me.) This one goes out to all the copy editors in the (publishing) hizzouse: a kerning hoodie. Why explain when you can demonstrate? Oh, I know it's deeply dorky, but it's awesome nonetheless.

Vagrant of the Day

Vagrant guy, rapping on his head: Hey! I don't have a fucking side of my head! It's all titanium and plastic!

Yeah, I'm thinking that Vagrant of the Day will have to be a recurring post. I keep overhearing thes pearls of (hobo) wit and (gutter punk) wisdom, yet, because these gems are dropped on the streets of Berkeley, I can't submit them to either Overheard in New York, Overheard in the Office, or Overheard at the Beach, (which, let's face it, are the originators and really the best quality overheard sites).

Dec 6, 2006

Scary Mary, Quite Contrary

Totally unrelated to the holidays, but amusing nonetheless: Scary Mary. I never before realized how ominous Mary Poppins could be in the right (wrong?) hands.

Practical Presents

Practicality isn't always exciting, but sometimes it's greatly appreciated when given in gift form.
I know I pimped the PowerSquid last year (and I've since bought one, so I stand by that suggestion), so, in a similar vein, here's the (stupidly named) LaCie Huby, a betentacled USB and FireWire hub. Again, a practical solution for when you've got wires coming from every which direction.

Let's face it: Everyone must, at least occasionally, bust some dust. But DustBusters and Dirt Devils have always been, at best, inoffensive, at worst, ugly. Until the advent of the Karim Rashid–designed Dirt Devil Kone. It's sleek, stylish, and functional—and the white one even glows!

Since it's almost 2007, it's about time to get a new calendar. Or two—I use a mini wall calendar at work (though a desk calendar would be just fine, too) and a large wall calendar at home. If you, too, are into the pinups, take a gander at the mini and maxi versions of a 2007 Gil Elvgren calendar. I'm also partial to this Anne Taintor calendar.

Another solid option (well, for me, anyway) is a sewing machine. I'd love to be able to repair fallen hems and torn seams in about a quarter of the time it takes to stitch them by hand. Not to mention that I'd finally be able to take on some of the larger, more complicated projects that I've been postponing. Target has machines starting at $50, but I'm not sure I'd trust just any old brand. Still, at $80, $85, and $90, you could get a Brother, Shark, or Singer, respectively.

Entirely unrelated to appliances but, in some circumstances, just as useful are these fingerless mittens. They're convertible fingerless gloves/mittens that are a godsend in cold weather. You can even type in them, which I've done before. I own several pair and would gladly stash a few more in a drawer, just in case. these are some less expensive options, but they're also less attractive, what with the bulky leather buttons.

Dec 5, 2006

Tree-Trimming Trinkets

Okay, I'm sorry if you're Jewish/Muslim/Hindu/whatever. But come on—what does a tree have to do with Jeebus anyway? Zip. So I say put one up regardless of your religion or lack thereof.
Now that we've established your right to a tree, you'll want to decorate it. As usual, I have suggestions for you.

Want to convey your "edginess" in ornament form? Try a glittery gun. (It's sold out online but still available in at least some stores.)
I double dog dare ya to find anyone who doesn't love A Christmas Story. Now put poor Ralphie in his bunny suit on the tree. Just don't drop it—it may be fra-gee-lay.
Here are some sweet little fishies, available in peach, red, and yellow. Equally as random but (almost) as cute are these four mushroom ornaments.
This purse and boots ornament set is the latest in Mrs. Claus–chic; get it for your holly jolly girlfriend, sister, aunt, or mom. Or even your rather hip grandma.
Also for the girls, the Met has an ever-increasing collection of shoe ornaments based on vintage designs. They're reasonably pretty, but here's my personal tip: If you want some fancy-schmancy shoes on your tree, check out the Just the Right Shoe collectibles by Raine. There's a great selection of fabulous, outlandish, and generally spiffy shoes. They're not ornaments per se, but see how most of the designs involve an ankle strap, a slingback, or some other sort of strap? Just slide a sturdy ornament hook or ribbon through the strap and voilà! Instant ornaments.
Finally, I should mention the soft-sculpture ornaments of Gladys Boalt. Trust me when I say that they're much, much, much more attractive in person than they are in pictures. Really detailed, nicely made, and representing a variety of historical, literary, cinematic, and legendary (fairy tale–iary?) characters, they're minor masterpieces (that clearly don't photograph well). (To further elaborate, compare and contrast a surprisingly good photo of the awesome Teddy Roosevelt ornament with a photo that's more representative of most of the Boalt pictures floating around online. See what I mean?)

New in Awful Things: Names, Hair

Somehow I managed to miss this whole phenomenon of Ben Underwood, the blind kid who uses echolocation to get around. Pretty amazing, though. More power to him. Also, I bet he'll be spared when our dolphin overlords seize control.
But I really feel compelled to highlight a tidbit just glossed over in the related video: The kid's mother is named Aquanetta Gordon. Aquanetta. Like the hair spray, Aqua Net. I have since spent a chunk of the morning trawling the internet for evidence of when Aqua Net was invented. (I know it was de rigeur in the '80s, but I think it's been around for much longer.) Aquanetta Gordon is in her 40s, so if the hair spray was invented after the mid or late '60s, she's got a crappy name and that's it. If Aqua Net was invented any earlier, though, Netta's parents must have been vicious bastards.

This is related by the slimmest of threads (i.e, hair), but I had to share anyway. As I walked to work this morning, I noticed a man about a block ahead of me. He was wearing a cap with what I initially thought was a long, rectangular piece of fur or sheepskin hanging from the back of the cap. As I closed on him, I realized that the "fur" was in fact his hair. It had been matted into a solid, rectangular mass as long as a table runner. (Without exaggeration, I can attest that it hung below his ass.) It was like one giant, steroidal dreadlock. Ugh.

Dec 4, 2006

And an X-Wing in a Pear Tree

Okay, how'd you like a little Star Wars action to kick off The Pinup's 2006 Holiday Gift Guide? I'm kinda down with the themes this year, and this one's good for kids, fanboys (and -girls), and, generally, most boy-types. Do the sensible thing and pretend the prequels never happened. Instead, pick up these excellent editions of the original trilogy, each of which includes both the original release and the tarted-up (fine, remastered) 2004 version.

To enhance the Star Wars experience, consider giving one of these funny yet fashionable tees: the ubiquitous Dark Side of the Garden or the lesser-known Boo Boo Walker. More for the kiddies is the Yoda backpack, which would also make a great substitute stocking.

Nov 30, 2006

My Eyes Need Diapers

Hi. Yes. I know I was going to start the holiday gift guide this week, but things happened. Er, thing happened. I got sick. And I cannot spew forth holiday cheer and fabulous gift ideas whilst my right eye waters like a faucet, my head pounds like a drum, and my nose and throat conspire to kill me. Anticipate the fabulosity next week.

Nov 28, 2006

I'm Dreaming of a Green Christmas

How to have an environmentally friendly Christmas has never been a particular concern of mine. To be frank, I've never even considered it before. But after reading this informative Slate article, I have resolved to be more aware of the holiday decisions I make and their consequences. Some of their suggestions are very easy to follow—I already combine shipping as much as possible, for example. Not only does it save on fuel, it saves me kizash. I'll buy some LED light strands this year and stay away from sparkly wrapping paper (well, as much as possible). Fortunately, I've been inadvertently green for years now thanks to my entire family's practice of reusing gift bags and Mylar wrap/tissue paper as long as possible. (Seriously, we have to coerce my grandmother into finally ditching a piece of Mylar that's wrinkled beyond recognition.) Other Slate suggestions, such as using Sellotape, are good, but pretty hard to follow. No problem if you're in the U.K., but here in the U.S. there is Scotch tape and knockoff Scotch tape and that's it. Good luck finding Sellotape. Though Berkeley is just crunchy enough that I may be able to scrounge up some. I'll have to check.

Nov 27, 2006

Pink is the New Dog

Okay, I know I said I'd start the holiday gift guide today, but I may have lied. What I really need to do today is show you this picture. I know the caption says that the dog is red, but it's quite clearly pink. My mom had a pink poodle once. True story. She dyed it pink, much to the consternation of her little brother. Hell, that's pretty creative for a little kid. The photo just reminded me of that incident.

Nov 22, 2006

For Your Pie-Hole

Okay, as it's the day before Thanksgiving, I'm starting to feel a bit festive. I think I shall begin the annual holiday gift guide in earnest on Monday. But here's one little suggestion in advance:

For anyone with a pronounced sweet tooth and an undying love of both pie and chocolate, the Godiva American Pies Collection is definitely the way to go. It's not cheap, but what is?

Happy Toikey Day (in advance).

Nov 21, 2006

Lactivists, misinformation, earmuffs. In that order.

This is infuriating as all hell; I thought we'd resolved the whole breastfeeding-in-public kerfuffle about 15 years ago. No? Well, peeps, get over it. It's a boob.

This, on the other hand, is more than infuriating. It's downright alarming. When I read about reactionaries like Eric Keroack—and discover that he's been put in charge of the U.S.'s family planning program—it frustrates me so much I want to cry. How horrifying that he's now in a position of power from which he can better spread his misinformation.

And, so that you're not thoroughly depressed after reading the aforementioned two articles, take a gander at these redonkulous Katamari earmuffs.

Nov 20, 2006

Wii Remote-1, TV-0

Ouch. Must suck to be this guy, whose Wii Remote slipped and cracked his TV screen. And I assumed the first Wii-related casualties would involve RSIs and dislocated shoulders.

Nov 17, 2006


Despite my intense fondness for teacup Yorkies, I am not responsible for this. Just figured I'd preemptively clear my name.

It's All About Wii

Okay, after reading this review of The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, I've decided that I need a Wii. Of course, if Jeremy Parish says that you'll find yourself "leaning forward in your seat, flailing away with the Wii Remote," chances are good that I'll be doing balletic and/or kickboxing moves across the room. (Hey, I get very agitated while playing games. I nearly put the controller through the screen during Lego Star Wars II. And they're only Legos.)
Also, it's been rumored that Namco will make a Katamari game for the Wii. That's the clincher. I need a Wii. Just not until they're a) actually available for non-crazy people and b) possibly less expensive.

Touristy Goodness

This set of photos is awesome. Apparently, this guy buys souvenirs, postcards, etc. and then superimposes them over actual attractions or locales. Doesn't sound that compelling, but it is.

Nov 15, 2006

Alex + Chloe = Nifty

I really like a bunch of the jewelry at Alex + Chloe. Simple, but unique. And actually affordable (well, most of it). I particularly like the antlers.

Nov 14, 2006

Fugging Baba Wawa

The Fug Girls regularly entertain me, but this time they've come up with an absolute gem: Baba Wawa's Diawy. I nearly pissed myself when I read it. It's a twue classic.

The Hosts From Hell

Poor Polish bastard. His experience as a foreign exchange student living with a super-religious Christian host family is my idea of hell.

Nov 13, 2006

Here, Lizard Lizard!

Yo, if I'd only known about the belly-massaging technique that Lily Capehart, a 10- (or 11-, according to different spots on her site) year -old girl, uses to relax wild lizards so that she can pose and dress them up, I'd have totally used it to my advantage when visiting my grandparents in Florida. Every time I'm there, I'm always on the lookout for these little guys; I catch them, hold them, pat them (gently), and let them go. But they're squirmy little buggers and, once in a while, they bite. (It feels like a pinprick.)

So, yeah. Useful technique. Hysterical photos. (Via Boing Boing.)

Nov 10, 2006

Old Russian Women are Crazy, Nyet?

Oh my god. This clip defies description. All I have to say is:
elderly Russians + gigundo purses + some disagreement = hilarity

FSM Sighting

How is it possible that more people aren't Pastafarians? I mean, shitloads of people believe in assorted gods, but how many of them have actually had a sighting? Watch and bask in the glory of His Noodly Appendage.

Nov 9, 2006

The Simpsons: Still Relevant

I know this is a bit belated, but I'm behind in my Simpsons-watching. I just saw the Treehouse of Horror episode (season 18) last night and was really impressed by the final segment, "The Day the Earth Looked Stupid." It went from funny to hilarious to depressing in quick succession. Very incisive. Not to mention timely, as it aired just days before the midterm elections. Watch the "The Day the Earth Looked Stupid" here.

Nov 8, 2006

Force Quit Indeed

I think this graphic says it all. (Thanks, Afshin.)

Just Deserts

So Britney Spears has apparently filed for divorce from Kevin Federline, aka K-Fed or, as he may now be called, Fed-Ex. Is this shocking (or even particularly interesting)? Not at all. Yet it's schadenfreudishly satisfying to see one of the world's most overexposed leeches getting tossed off the gravy train. Still, I'll believe it when I see it.

Speaking of certain undesirables getting what they deserve, Saddam Hussein has been sentenced to death. Again, I'll believe it when I see it.

Nov 7, 2006

The Pig is Indeed a Magical Animal

Now this is a movement I can support: Peace Through Pork. Especially when there are accessories such as the bacon awareness wristband.

Nov 3, 2006

Hooray for Early Birthday Presents!

Yay! I got my DS Lite last night. And a copy of Brain Age. I have yet to play it (or even turn it on), but I a) needed to charge it and b) did have to come to work and, you know, do work. But am very excited and plan to play my little heart out on my flight tomorrow. Thanks, honey!

Nov 1, 2006

The "Real" Journalist and the "Fake" Journalists: Guess Which Is Which

So my favorite "journalist," Maureen Dowd, has written an article about Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart for Rolling Stone, a decently long excerpt of which you can read here. It's entertaining enough that I think I'll buy the issue, something I haven't done since approximately my senior year of high school, when there was a cover story on Mike Myers and the Austin Powers phenomenon. Actually, I think I stole that one from the hair salon.

Incidentally, best line of the article:
COLBERT and STEWART in unison: His dad was a goat-herder!

Oct 31, 2006

The Ultimate Treat


The trick is—you're not getting it. Of course, neither am I. Happy Halloween anyway.

Oct 30, 2006

Time to Die

Okay, so this death's-head pocketwatch is a bit on the expensive side. But it's so deliciously macabre.

Oct 27, 2006

Mooning Over Jewelry

Ooh, I love this Smoon Bijou necklace. It looks like you're wearing the moon around your neck. So pretty.

Oct 25, 2006

Goatse: A Reminder

Warning: Neither safe for work nor for your own gag reflexes.

It had been a long, long time since I'd seen the original goatse, so I decided to inflict it on myself again, just as a refresher. Never ceases to amaze and disgust me. However, this tribute page cracks me up. Especially the best cake ever.

Oct 23, 2006

On Sexy Halloween Costumes: Follow-Up

Sometimes the Onion Radio News really hits the proverbial nail on the head. Case in point: Sexy Nurse Having Trouble Finding Halloween Costume.

Oct 19, 2006

On Sexy Halloween Costumes: A Parable

Leave it to the Times to publish a really useful article about Halloween costumes. Apparently, the Times asserts, there is an abundance, perhaps even an overabundance, of sexy Halloween costumes for women. To which I must respond: No shit?

To add my view to this vital issue, I must say that I have no problem with the entire sexy genre of costumes, only with the fact that so many of them are unoriginal. Whipping out your boobs and putting on a miniskirt is passé at this point. Still, the sheer volume (and I mean in number, not in the amount of fabric used) is a bit bothersome. When trawling the internet and physical costume shops in search of ideas for this year's costume, I did feel that, for all the variety, the choices were rather limited, as it was pretty difficult to find any ensembles that didn't leave the majority of one's body exposed to the elements.

In conclusion, I shall contribute my one sexy costume–related anecdote. Last year, my friend Anne and I were ambling through Ricky's shortly before Halloween. Naturally, there was a glut of costumes on display. We counted, among others, a naughty nurse, sexy secretary, foxy firefighter, porny policewoman, and even a brazen barista. Or a busty barista, if you prefer. Whatever. I'm making these names up as I go. In any event, Anne was most dismayed to see not a single racy doctor costume. (She's in med school and felt excluded, I assume.) We agreed that it was rather sexist to allow women to be all manner of scantily clad professionals (in addition to the usual array of flirty fairies, dirty devils, and wanton witches), but to deny the ladies the opportunity to dress like ethically questionable doctors. How misogynistic. Fortunately, this year I stumbled across a sexy surgeon costume. Now the balance has been redressed—skimpily, of course.

And Now, a Message From Our Sponsors

For a very long time, I could have used a feed aggregator. I just never thought to look for one. Now one has come to me: ajarr. Am a big fan, and not just because it's the brainchild of two dear friends. Though I'm sure that helps. Seriously, though, it's an awesome idea and already proving very useful, despite its status as pre-beta. Check it out.

While I'm pimping stuff, I might as well mention that Tully's pumpkin spice Bellaccino is delectable. And I don't have any connection to Tully's (except for spending too much money on coffee there lately), so this recommendation is totally nepotism-free. If you're in the Pacific Northwest, I strongly suggest you get one. It's orange, slushy, and is made with real pumpkin—what more do you want from a drink? Other than booze, you lushes.

Oct 17, 2006

Deadline (Again)

On deadline. Am always on deadline.

Oct 13, 2006

One-Stop Shopping for All Your Haunting Needs

Holy Great Pumpkin. If I were loaded, I would definitely have to place a few orders from The Scarefactory. I've always wanted to throw a Halloween party in a genuinely frightening setting, but most of my decorations are more of the cute and kitschy variety. But just imagine if I had guests walk through the corridor of corpses? Or if I set up one of these scary-ass animated characters (particularly the death statue or the scarionette)? Or any of this haunted furniture? My guests would piss themselves.

Oh. Maybe that's why I wouldn't decorate with these: too much cleanup.

Oct 12, 2006

South Park Takes on WoW

OMFG. South Park does WoW. There's a PK on the loose, ganking all the n00bs. But the boys decide it's time for some payback pwnage. LOL.

How sad is it that I understand what I just wrote? (Don't answer that.) Seriously, though, the episode is hy-freaking-sterical.

Oct 10, 2006

I Pwned Yo Mama

You'd have to be a pretty suave-ass motherfucker to pull off this shirt; it proclaims to all your videogame geekiness while throwing out a "yo mama" joke. Now that is classy. With a capital K. (Thanks for the heads-up, Zack.)

Fashion That Moves You...Er, Itself

I'm not a particular fan of most of the outfits in Hussein Chalayan's most recent collection, but check out these animatronic fashions. You should really watch this video of the show to see the clothes in action. (But mute your speakers; the soundtrack is horrendous.) Some seem awkward and gimmicky, but most of the animatronic designs look surprisingly wearable. And I totally want the hat, though I'd wear it with...well, something. Something other than nothing, unlike the poor nekkid model.

Oct 6, 2006

Cute 'n' Cuddly

Yeah, yeah, my posts lately have been sporadic. I've been busy, okay? With actual work, the writing of short stories, and the newly discovered art of crafting jewelry from Shrinky-Dinks. (I tied up the office toaster oven for much of Tuesday.)

Anyway, for a cute and cuddly weekend, check out the adorable teensy-weensy needled felt animals in Making Mitsi's Etsy shop. (I could do without the accessories, but the little animals are adorable.)

Oct 4, 2006

Hardcore Pumpkins

For some truly macabre pumpkin carving awesomeness, take a gander here. It's extreme...TO THE MAX! (Thanks, Zack.)

Get Your Pumpkin Carving Tools Ready

Because the Flying Spaghetti Monster Pumpkin Contest 2006 is on!

Oct 3, 2006

Karaoke on the Go

This could be a terribly dangerous idea for all us closet karaokers: the iKaraoke. Could make for some fun drunken karaoke parties. (Are there really any other kind?)

Overheard Right Outside Our Damn Window

For some reason, every drunken college student, homeless can collector, stoned hippie, and general crackpot in Berkeley chooses to argue/protest/sing/piss in front of our apartment. I don't know why; we're just lucky, I guess. So tonight a rather naggish chick and a guy who sounded like Walter Brennan decided to have their very loud, very personal conversation outside our window.

Some highlights:
Woman: Everyone thinks I'm the richest woman in Berkeley. I'm not; I'm the poorest woman in Berkeley!

A few unintelligible seconds later, she continued:
I'm going to lose my house!

(Hm, she has a house. That probably makes her better off than I am.)
And another point in her litany of complaints:
I don't want to, but I have to pay someone to clean the bathroom! I don't want to, but I have to pay someone to clean the pool!

Stupefying, no?

Sep 28, 2006

Some Stormtrooper Action

Hot. (Surely I'm not the only person out there with a stormtrooper fetish?)

Sep 26, 2006

Yet Another Decorative Use of Fiber Optics

I seem to be a sucker for anything that features fiber optics. (Really, now, it's hard to go wrong with fiber optics.) Unsurprisingly, I found these unique lights rather interesting. They look delicate and somehow organic. Probably expensive.

Sep 25, 2006

The Perfect Kitty

As I once again demonstrated my unfailing fondess for teeny tiny animals, Zack pointed me to this plan to make permakitties, or cats who remain kitten-size forever.

Zack: combine that with the hypo-allergenic kittens i saw this morning and, besides a 10,000 dollar kitty, you get a kitty i'd actually want
Me: yo--that is awesome.
Me: hypoallergenic permakittens? we could conquer the world with those.
Zack: seriously

Is That a Pygmy Marmoset in Your Pocket?

Oh my god. OH MY GOD! I really, really, really want a pygmy marmoset. With the cute little tailies and the shmushy little faces and the furry little bodies and the clingy little hands and the hoyvin mayvin! Oh, they're so precious they're making me Frinkify.

Sep 22, 2006

Furniture Porn (Yes, Furniture Porn)

I don't know who was dropped on his/her head before coming up with this idea, but it is surprisingly funny: furniture porn. Not people on chairs. Just chairs. No people. Just naughty, sexy chairs.

Sep 21, 2006

Wrapping Up

For those among us who are compulsively elaborate gift-wrappers, check out Whimsy's collections of themed and color-coordinated wrapping paper. They're all double-sided, which is particularly awesome. Unfortunately, they're not cheap. But it's worth is for certain special gifts, I should think.

Sep 19, 2006

So Over the Rainbow

These Roy G. Biv shoes are adorable. And on sale! But not on enough of a sale for me.

Hm. The Roy G. Biv thing has always seemed slightly foreign to me. I heard about it late in the game; apparently I went to a developmentally retarded elementary school until we moved when I was in third grade. (You know that bubble-blower necklace craze of the late '80s/early '90s? It hit my old school when I was in fifth grade. We totally had the bubble-blower necklace thing by fourth grade in my new school.) We hadn't covered the whole Roy G. Biv acronym in my old school, but all the kiddies in the new school seemed to know about it. Smug bastards. Whatever. I knew the colors of the rainbow anyway, without having to memorize some stupid acronym about some schmuck named Roy.

Sep 18, 2006

When Fashion Attacks

I always try to keep abreast of current fashion; I don't often follow them (High-waisted pants on a short-waisted girl? Uggs with sundresses in July? Leggings? No thank you.), but I like knowing what the trends are. So I finally got around to catching up on the Fashion Week goings-on (covered quite thoroughly in New York magazine), which I found generally lackluster. In my opinion, the collections were overall dull and featured few standouts. Well, few standouts of the good variety.

The Rodarte collection was spectacular in its complete disregard for the female form. After clicking through the slideshow pics, I was struck by the thought that the designer must truly hate women to truss them up in such unattractive, constricting, unflattering garments (most of which violated what should be, if it isn't already, a cardinal rule of fashion: Clothes should be worn; they should not wear you). If these monstrosities are supposed to be some sort of sculpturual works of art, fine. Hang them in the MoMA; don't foist them onto hapless models.

Amazingly enough, the Rodarte line is created by two sisters and, as their website demonstrates, isn't chock-full of the heinous creations they displayed at Fashion Week. I do hope it was some sort of drug- or head injury–induced aberration.

When a Geek Loves a Woman

They have this Super Mario–themed cake at their wedding.

Sep 17, 2006

Warm Hands, Cold Office

Meant to post this yesterday, but I was in too much of a hurry to get the hell out of the office. (It's been a long, long couple of weeks.) I just discovered exactly what I needed at my last job, where the air conditioning was permanently set on arctic: USB heated gloves. Here's the men's/unisex version and here's the ladies' version. They could be very helpful, especially when you're using a mouse and you develop "mouse hand" (that nasty numb, cold sensation you—or those of us with crappy circulation—get).

Sep 14, 2006

The Barbie Beetle

Whoa. If I had seen this during my high school years, I would have dropped a puddle: a Barbie Beetle. For real people, I mean. Not for Barbie. I already had that one.

Wiiiiii! It's the Wii!

Ah, at long last we know: Nintendo's Wii is supposed to ship on November 19th and will retail for $250. (Take that, $600 PS3.) 1UP's got the scoop on all things Wii and wonderful.

Sep 12, 2006

Poisonous Propaganda

It's shocking how unabashedly overt this German children's book, The Toadstool, is in its anti-Semitism. I mean, I know it's Fascist propaganda, but it's so obvious it's nauseating. After reading it you may feel like you need a shower. Grotesque.

I Want to Spock You Like an Animal

Have been too busy to breathe, but I just had to share this minor masterpiece: Star Trek + Nine Inch Nails = Closer. Exceptional editing.

Sep 10, 2006

Magic (Glowing) Carpet Ride

Ooh, more glowy things! (I know, I'm a pushover for the sparklies and such.) I bet this LED wallpaper would look rad in nightclubs and I love the magic carpet. (Though I'm not exactly sure what one would do with said carpet.)

Sep 7, 2006

ULTIMATE...Blog Posts

Heh. This Wired article may be bitchy but it sure is funny. And quite apt.

Sep 5, 2006

More Than OK

This is undoubtedly one of the most awesome music videos I've ever seen. It's OK Go dancing about on treadmills. Now, I had previously enjoyed the silly, yet well-choreographed antics of this video (particularly the slow-mo faux fisticuffs), but when you transpose those frolics to treadmills, the result is spectacular. It's one continuous shot that reportedly took 15 takes to nail (not counting rehearsals). Apparently the band also performs some of their routines during live shows, too, as evidenced by this clip (with very quiet, lousy sound). Watching them perform on stage reminds me of nothing so much as a little girls' dance recital. In a good way. Moreover, I actually like their music. That's always a plus.

New From the Department of Idiocy

This poor bastard. Rescue over 200 people, get sued.

Aug 31, 2006

Hit (and Hit, Hit, and Keep Hitting) and Run

In case anyone hasn't heard, some nutjob went on a rampage through San Francisco on Tuesday, hitting 19 people with his SUV. (Amazingly, there was only one fatality.) So bizarre. I'm fine, of course. I had the day off, in fact, so I could go to the doctor. Freaky shit going on in this sick, sad world.

Aug 28, 2006

Waiter, There's a Girl on My Plate

Nice. I love this retro pinup–themed tableware. Check out the Dirty Dishes collection, which would look pretty cute accompanied by the Girl Glasses (yeah pole dancing!).

Also, take a peeky peek at the adorable Hula collection. Perfect for your next luau. Or if you're trying to turn your home into a tiki bar. Which is, of course, a noble goal.

Crunchy But Clean

I know this sounds highly crunchy, but I've been interested in trying some environmentally friendly cleaning products. No, it's not because I live in Berkeley; it's because I keep using Clorox Clean-Up in the bathtub and getting all light-headed. Plus my hands wind up smelling like bleach. No good. But I tried some fruity Method shower spray once before and it did fuck-all (other than smell lovely). Fortunately, the folks at Green Home Living performed some tests, resulting in the handy dandy article "Which Eco Cleansers Work?". So, as soon as this last bottle of brain-melting Clorox is empty, I know where to turn.

Aug 27, 2006

Retro Betterness

Oooh! Stop Staring, the manufacturer of the previously mentioned dresses has a website, which has so many awesome vintage reproduction dresses...I'm overwhelmed. And they're significantly cheaper, too. I could get more than one without breaking the bank. Oh, so many choices, so little money!

Aug 25, 2006

Retro Goodness

Ooh, I just stumbled across the cutest vintage-inspired dresses. A bunch of them are really adorable. Here are a handful: the honey dear dress, the jackie dress, the annabelle dress, the bombshell dress, and the most amusingly named of the bunch, the tipsy housewife dress. Perhaps one or two would make a good reward for when I lose that pesky weight.

Aug 24, 2006

DIY Naptime

Who doesn't need a power nap every once in a while? Personally, I'm in favor of daily siestas. This gizmo might just help fulfill your napping needs.

Aug 23, 2006

Dark and Dorky

Oh dearie me. The Look Book Goes to Ozzfest and meets some of the freaky-freaks. My favorite is Sky Claudette Soto, who writes bad poetry and reads it in "a very old-fashioned accent." Pretentious twit.

Aug 21, 2006

Coming to a Theatarr Nearr You

Pretty arrrsome, I must say. There be a pirate film festival in Berkeley in Septembarr and Octobarr. Count me in.

Aug 18, 2006

On Wings of Light

For all the world, I thought I had already posted about this, but I guess not. My point, however, is that Tord Boontje's gorgeous Icarus pendant light is available for sale in the U.S. And it's actually affordable! I know what I want for my birthday. (You can also get it on Amazon, which is handy if you have a gift certificate or whatnot. Otherwise the price is about the same.)

Aug 17, 2006

Snakes on the Motherfuckin' Daily Show

This has to be one of the best Daily Show interviews ever. You know, Samuel L. Jackson may star in every bloody movie that's made these days, but he remains entertaining. Especially in his appraisal of the best. clip. ever.

Aug 16, 2006

No Fat Chicks

Hm. Perhaps someone should have told the folks at Details that, even if you're trying to be really complimentary, chicks don't like to be called fat. Or "plate-scrapers." Read the astonishingly tactless article and be sure to check out the accompanying (incomprehensibly uneven—Miss Piggy, Blair from The Facts of Life, and Kristin Davis?) slideshow.

Then read this Salon article, which dissects the aforementioned Details piece quite admirably. And asks the vital question, "Why is there a pig in heels?"

Aug 15, 2006

Cool Blacklight Tattoos

Admittedly, I'm not certain about the potential health risks involved, but these blacklight tattoos are awesome. Especially the skeleton design on the guy's arm. It's a good thing I didn't know about these (or they weren't being done) when I was in high school—what with my living in the equivalent of a rave, I surely would have gotten one.

Oh, to explain the rave comment: My bedroom contained not only a blacklight and the requisite blacklight paraphernalia (poster, ceiling stars, candles, wall hanging, etc.), but I also had a motorized disco ball, a laser light thingy, a flashing neon dolphin, a strobe light, a lava lamp, two rainbowy light jimjams, and an assortment of other electricity-sucking shiny things that rather defied description.

Washington as You've Never Seen Him

I'm not even sure how to preface this. Don't drink anything while watching it. And pity the poor British children. (Thanks, Christophe.)

Aug 14, 2006


Yo, next time I need some coat hooks, I apparently have some pretty nifty, quirky options. I love the old-school barroom/pub feel of these, but these may be more widely applicable in our newfangled technomalogical world full of cursors and clickers and pointers and the swirling beach ball of death.

Aug 10, 2006

Bowled Over

Now, I know nothing about Janice Dickinson except that she's got more plastic in her than Barbie and she occasionally does rather stupid things that are then distributed throughout that series of tubes known as the internet. But, even with that slim amount of background knowledge, I cracked the fuck up at this clip.

Disturbing, Distressing, and Douchebaggy

Whoa. This is an extremely well written, exceedingly disturbing L.A. Times article about Girls with Low Self-Esteem, er, Girls Gone Wild founding douche Joe Francis. I've always found the whole Girls Gone Wild phenomenon kind of upsetting. It's not the porn aspect. Part of what bothers me is that it exploits young/drunk/stupid/vulnerable girls (who, admittedly, should know better), but, more than that, the whole franchise seems to devalue so many things. Not only does it devalue the girls (who evidently believe that getting naked on camera is a fair trade for a t-shirt or hat), but it also devalues legitimate porn actresses. (Inasmuch as porn actresses can be legitimate.) Plus, one of the tenets of Girls Gone Wild seems to be that many girls can be convinced to do anything when intoxicated enough; much of the porn industry has been trying to avoid that very image of drunk and/or drugged participants. It seems highly inappropriate (not to mention creepy) that Joe Francis is getting rich by persuading drunken amateurs to take off their clothes.

Aug 9, 2006

Through Rose-Colored Glasses

If you really want to rock the Lolita look, forget plaid schoolgirl skirts and Mary Janes. Go for the sunglasses.

Aug 7, 2006

Merman Reacharound

Warning: Totally NSFW. Unless, of course, you happen to work at my office, which is where a coworker first introduced me to this unforgettable merman reacharound tattoo. At first you think, "Hm. That's strange." Then you notice the background and think, "Ew. That's kind of gross, albeit in a picturesque way." Then you realize that a) that's not a fish on the front merman's lap, that's his cock and b) you can see an itty bit of the back merman's balls. Which means that you know where his penis is. And the whole thing gets rather disturbing.

I mean, did this artist have no clue at all about merman anatomy? It all looks very incorrect to me.

Aug 5, 2006

In My Defense...

I've recently been accused of failing to say anything interesting on my blog. That may be true. Sometimes even I am bored by the shallowness of my posts. Here's the deal, though: I'd rather say something definitive about insignificant matters than give short shrift to really important issues. For instance...

Israel and Lebanon? Not good.

Floyd Landis and the doping charges? Eh, not so sure how I feel about that.

Mel Gibson? Big fucking shock there. (Though I didn't expect the "sugar tits" line.)

The real world and its real issues just aren't any fun. That doesn't mean that I'll never post about them. I guess it just means that not only does the topic have to grab my interest, but I also have to feel that I have something to say about it. Bah. Now I'm all somber. The real world makes me an unhappy bunny.

Aug 4, 2006

Mals de TĂȘte de Mort

Yeah, I know that once the Times has covered a trend, it's officially ubiquitous (and probably on its way out), but I'm not out of my skull phase yet. Well, I only recently entered it. (I blame my undying affection for The Goonies.) Anyway, I think these rhinestone skull earrings are awesome. And they'd match one of my shirts perfectly....

Aug 3, 2006

Motorcycle Mania

I keep meaning to mention this, but I repeatedly forget. So every few days, on my way to work I pass a block where there are--literally--at least 20 motorcycles and Vespas parked in a row. It's the strangest thing to see a shitload of motorcycles plonked in the midst of San Francisco's financial district. My favorite (and I know this makes me sound revoltingly girly) is an opalescent white Vespa. It's just so erection-inducingly sleek and sexy.

Aug 2, 2006

Loco for LocoRoco

Okay, this is pretty much the only reason I want a PSP: LocoRoco. How freaking cute is it?

Aug 1, 2006

Mmm, Floor Ethanol

Some people and their fucking lawsuits. Seriously, this sounds like another one of Homer Simpson's unsuccessful get-rich-quick schemes.

Jul 31, 2006

Crystal Crazy

This may just be the answer for those of us who simply adore chandeliers but hardly have the room or funds necessary to bedeck the house. Wear some vintage crystal jewelry instead.

Hm. I wonder where my grandmother's old chandelier has gone?

Click Your Heels and Sparkle

Have I mentioned my enduring love of glittery shoes? This time, they're pink.

Jul 28, 2006

Time to Hassel the Hoff

Allow me to share with you David Hasselhoff's new music video, "Jump in My Car." He's getting very Shatneresque, no? Incidentally, does anyone else find it creepy that the chicks he's hitting on in this video are surely young enough to be his daughters? Ewwww....

Oh, and, just in case you live under a rock, here's his classic version of "Hooked on a Feeling."

Hm. Can You Get Your Internet Tubes Tied?

In case anyone didn't already know, the Internet is a series of tubes. Here's the most entertaining wearable take on that sentiment I've seen yet.

Jul 27, 2006

The iNnovative iBar

'Cause everything cool and technologically advanced needs an i preceding its name, here's the iBar. Yes, it's a terribly formulaic name, but the product itself is pretty rad. It's an interactive illuminated bar. Imagine playing drunken Pong on it!

Jul 26, 2006

Pathetic But True

While well written, this Salon article makes me depressed to be a copy editor. (I know the article's about proofreading, but that's very similar to copy editing.) Of course, there are the memorable highlights of the job, too: Just yesterday, I participated in an in-depth debate about the proper spellings of Slushee, Slushie, slushy, Slurpee, and Squishee.

Jul 25, 2006

One Dress, Four Variations

After I 1) lose some weight and 2) save up some kizash, I'm going to have to get one of these dresses; I prefer the white and red and the red and cream (which looks yellow, not cream) versions to the white and brown and the burgundy and white versions. But they're all pretty darn cute.

Jul 24, 2006

It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's a Cursor...No, It's a Kite!

I know, I know: Like me, you've probably seen this kite all over the internets lately. Just in case you haven't, though, check it out. Awesomeness and double-takes guaranteed.

Heaven Forbid! Not Looking!

Could this complaint be for real? If so, it is positively the most retarded thing I've ever heard. And I don't mean retarded in the Sarah Silverman, "can do anything" sense.

Jul 23, 2006

Dorothy Ain't Got Nothing on Me

I am such a sucker for sparkly shoes. This Topshop pair is adorable (albeit expensive, at £85), but I think I like this Faith pair even better. And they're cheaper, too. Though £35 is somewhat costly, too. That's 65 bucks. Khrap. This glittery shoe habit just might get expensive....

Jul 22, 2006

Taking Plushies to the Next Level

Teddy Babes: Plush girlfriends for boys too BIG for teddy bears.

Need I say more?

Actually, yes, I must. Only two words, though: pussy velour.

Jul 21, 2006

CTY Represent!

As soon as I read the words Mandatory Fun, I knew Meghan O'Rourke's article was about CTY. Despite the whole "nerd camp" stigma, CTY was an awesome experience or, rather, two awesome experiences, as I attended two summers in a row. I think, if it's still around, I want to send my kids there. Though it was pretty regimented (O'Rourke's not kidding when she calls it Mandatory Fun), it was both intellectually and socially stimulating. During my time at CTY in Carlisle, Pennsylvania, I caught tons of fireflies, got a crash course in living with a roommate, participated in a horribly awkward flirtation, and wrote much of an impractical film script. (I also began to explore the challenging world of bare midriffs.) Dear lord, I hope my children aren't as socially awkward as I was.

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Cupcakes

Well, this baking tin combines the appearance of cupcakes and ice cream. If only there were a way to combine the tastes as well. Thinking....

Jul 20, 2006


Godammit. I have an anchovy bone stuck in my throat.

Jul 19, 2006

Fuzzy and Fruity

This particular Cat and Girl comic may just contain the most accurate description of a kiwi that I've ever heard: A kiwi is like if a hamster was a fruit. Pretty damn perceptive.

Jul 17, 2006

Jacket and Tie Required? No Problem.

I do like these cheeky little tie necklaces, though I rather doubt I'd pay $80 for one. Quite a clever concept, though.

Pinup Wants a Cocktail

As long as I'm on the cocktail theme, allow me to say that this shirt is fab.

Jul 15, 2006

Ice Ice Baby

Oy, it's been a busy, busy week. Hm. Sound like time to kick back with a nice, cool, refreshing cocktail. To that end, one might need ice. And, when one needs ice, one might want a kick-ass ice bucket, no? This stylish spherical one and this quirky ice block–shaped one are my current two favorite choices.

Jul 12, 2006

Snake on a Plane

For real real. Not just for play play. (Thanks, Zack.)

Jul 11, 2006

More Japanese Wackiness

This Japanese potty training video is nuts. Craptacular, if you will.

Jul 7, 2006

Night of the Living Bouillabaisse

Sometimes, just sometimes, the Times contains such snippets of brilliance and hilarity that I'm floored. One such moment occurred while I was reading A.O. Scott's review of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, in which he labeled the undead human-sea creature hybrid pirates "Night of the Living Bouillabaisse." An unmitigated gem, that one.

Jul 6, 2006

Springtime for Kitler

Had a nice long weekend, full of picnicking and Simpsons-watching, cramps. Forgot to link to these ridiculous kitlers before. There's something inherently preposterous about cats that look like Hitler. Poor kitties. I hope they've all developed very sweet personalities to compensate for their rather cranky (if not downright foreboding) visages.

Jun 30, 2006

Udderly Stylish

The rather unfortunately named Udder is a collaboration of U.K. artists with a pretty high concentration of clever products. Give it a peek.

Practically Pretty

These elaborate security window grills are an elegant solution to the one of the problems posed by first-floor windows.

Jun 28, 2006

Robot Chicken Takes on Star Wars

This Star Wars spoof on Robot Chicken is hysterical. Gotta love Palpatine's jerk-off hand motion. Classic.

Our Fairy Neighbors

Oh, how precious! Evidently there are teensy-weensy little fairy doors dotting Ann Arbor, Michigan. I want a little fairy door! And some fairies. (The tiny little winged kind, not the kind marching in this past Sunday's pride parade.) (Thanks, Boing Boing.)

Jun 27, 2006

Jon Stewart, Steven Colbert, and Videogames

Hm. Videogames seem to be a hot topic these days. The Daily Show had a recent segment about the jackasses in Congress and their game-related fretting, and Steven Colbert has been hawking World of ColbertCraft on The Colbert Report. Both clips are highly entertaining.

Jun 26, 2006

Jun 23, 2006

Those Wacky Japanese

Here's a good way to start the weekend: with a clip of some insane pranks played at some Japanese ski resort. It starts slowly, but trust me--it gets good.

Jun 22, 2006

Excuse Me, You Have a Yoda on Your Back

Oh. My. God. You know you want a Yoda backpack, you Star Wars dorks.

Jun 21, 2006

If I Were...

a belligerent, drunken DivX machine, this would totally be me. Succinct but true, no?

Let This be a Lesson

to you and your children. Sharing is bad.

Jun 19, 2006

The Copy Ninja Will Kick Your Ass

You might not realize this, but I, the titular pinup, am also a copy ninja. Yes, I am one of the few, the noble, the righteous, the upholders of spelling, grammar, punctuation, and other such pillars of language. As a copy ninja, I must be ever-vigilant on my constant crusade. Hence the lack of recent posts. I'm too busy keeping the world safe from craptacular writing.

Jun 14, 2006

Harvard Guy

Evidently Seth MacFarlane gave this year's commencement speech at Harvard. (The audio and video are horribly out of sync, but it's awesome even if you just listen to it.) As I lamented before, why do those Harvard jerks get all the cool speakers? Bah.

Jun 13, 2006


This morning, while waiting to cross the street, I noticed a cab with an ad on top of it for the Hilton chain of hotels. I did an immediate double-take, because I thought it said The Hilton Family: Be Respectable. And that seemed pretty farfetched to me. Sure enough, when I squinted and read it again, I saw that it said The Hilton Family: Be Hospitable. That's more likely. They're nothing if not hospitable, from what I hear re: Paris and her welcoming vagina.

Jun 9, 2006


When Fox News says Ann Coulter sucks, it means everyone thinks she's a dimebag ho.

Remembrance of Things Bitchy

Oh yes. I remember what I wanted to say yesterday. Ann Coulter is a cunt.

Technical Difficulties

So Blogger has been acting up for the past couple of days. (I actually did have something to say yesterday, but I forget what it was.) Hm. And it seems to be cranky today, too. I keep finding myself thinking that I should be reimbursed for the two days of craptacularity, but then I remember that I don't pay at all. And the world realigns.

Jun 7, 2006

The Obligatory Snakes on a Plane Post

Only this one is better than all of the others out there. A bold claim, you say, and I concur. But I can back it up: click on the song "Snakes on a Plane" and you will see why.

Incidentally, SOAP has now entered the popular lexicon; all the cool kids evidently use it to indicate when something's patently obvious, i.e., synonymously with duh. For example:

"Yo, this blog is totally awesome!"
"Um, snakes on a plane. I read it daily."

Jun 6, 2006

Adorable Aprons

See, this is good design: These aprons are functional (they wipe clean!) and so fucking adorable. (Semi-expensive, unfortunately, too.) Obviously, I want one.


These limited-edition peacock chucks rock. Hard. (I don't care if some of you--you know who you are--think they're gaudy. The correct word is elaborate.) Some of the eyelet ones are cool, too. The pink gingham and argyle designs are nifty, too. And the houndstooth print is so fugly it's kinda neat. Oh, and I would so wear these every Christmas.

Jun 5, 2006

Busted, Bitter, and Busy

Have nothing entertaining to say. Feel crappy and cranky and was rather busy for much of the day. And had a dreadful headache. Screw you guys, I'm leaving.

Jun 1, 2006


Last week was rather busy at work, so I forgot to post what had really been the entertainment highlight of the week. As I was walking to work one morning, I passed some shoeless, bedreaded homeless guy (one of many) who was just waking up. He was chatting with his dog, let out a tremendous belch, and noticed me walking by. After exchanging the usual good morning–type pleasantries, he said:
"Hey, don't go to work. Hang out with me. We can smoke weed all day!"
"Tempting," I replied. "But no."

Happy Birthday, Marilyn

Today would have been Marilyn Monroe's 80th birthday. I should be wearing diamonds....

May 31, 2006

Wearing Between the Lines

At first I didn't get it. Then I looked at the (still-less-than-ideal) close up. Between the lines, huh? I get it. Moreover, I'd be tempted to buy it...if only I could see the back of the design. Good products, crappy site design.

More Bright and Shiny Things

What can I say? I'm a sucker for bright, shiny, glowy things. Some of the products here are tacky (e.g., the glommy butterflies or the gecko wall lights), but others are really cool. (My personal fave is the curtain lights. I think.)

May 26, 2006

Return of the Clerks

I know, I know, sequels suck, but I'm all excited about Clerks II nonetheless. Check out some of the trailers here. I'll stay ladylike and refrain from commenting on Randal's puffiness.

May 25, 2006


Check out this neato Balloon Lamp. Simple idea, but I bet a bunch of them would look awfully festive. Bet it'd be pretty easy to make it yourself, too.... I feel a project coming on.

May 23, 2006

From Zero to Laughingstock in 4 Minutes, 42 Seconds

Hm. Sylvia Night, the Icelandic contestant in the 2006 Eurovision competition, seems a bit miffed that she didn't win.

May 22, 2006

Bay to Breakers Awesomeness

Yesterday was the annual Bay to Breakers race in San Francisco; I had the extreme good fortune to be invited to a race-viewing party held in an apartment directly overlooking Hayes St., up which the "runners" progress. Totally awesome. Definitely more of a parade than a race, it should be clarified. I found particularly entertaining the Trojan Horse (also in an excellent shot here), the woolly mammoth and cavepeople, and the katamari crew. Oh, and don't forget the Vagina Ladies. I'm not going to even comment on the numerous naked people (most of whom, let's face it, I really didn't want to see naked).

I can't wait till next year. Yeah B2B 2007!

May 18, 2006

Barely Less Addictive Than Tomacco

Today I decided to try--drumroll, please--Clamato Tortilla Chips. There was one lonely little bag sitting the the office vending machine. Surprisingly good, slightly spicy, and very red.

May 17, 2006

Wrap a Record 'Round Your Neck

This rock jewellery is a cool idea, but I do hope nobody's cutting up otherwise pristine records. That would be a dreadful waste. Looks neat, though.

"He's so far inside the closet, he's in Narnia."

Comments like these give me periodic hope in the intellect of humanity. Just as I begin to think that most people are so intensely stupid that I'd rather tear off my ears than listen to another inane conversation, someone overhears such a gem.

May 16, 2006

The Soft Electric

Ooh, I would totally give this chick an A for her thesis project. On the subject of wearable technology, NYU graduate Grace Kim designed and created what she calls The Soft Electric, an embroidered and LED-dotted capelet that is, surprisingly, tasteful and delicate. All sorts of info about the project can be found here. I wonder if she'd consider making more to sell....

Rainbow Showers

And no, this has nothing to do with showers of the golden variety. Get your minds out of the gutter, people. Or maybe mine was preemptively gutter-bound.

Anyway, my point is that these temperature-sensitive color-changing tiles are rad. If it were affordable, I'd totally redo a shower in them. It would be like showering in a giant mood ring...trippy, yo.

May 15, 2006

Belly Up to the Books, Boys, Buddhas.

Dance Dance Evolution

This video is six minutes of solid gold awesomeness. I was seriously worried that I was beginning to be a nuisance in the office because I couldn't stop laughing. I was afraid I'd start crying. Or possibly wet myself. And I think I may want to have Judson Laipply's babies. Especially if they come out already dancing like their dad.

May 5, 2006

For the Country Cabin

I'm generally not a big fan of antler-themed decor, but I rather like this chandelier, largely because the antlers are ceramic and not actually real. It just looks cozy and appropriate for one's country house or mountain cabin. Remind me to buy one when I can afford a place in the country.

Huzzah for Pirate Movies Starring Hot Actors!

Every summer I seem to wind up in the theatre (possibly because of the heat), watching at least one certifiable blockbuster. I made my choice for this summer's flick months ago. Here's the full trailer for Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. Yeah, hot, hotter, and hottest. Act your little thigh-boots off.

May 4, 2006

Writing for Real Real (Not for Play Play)

Have been trying to use my newfound downtime at work to start some short stories, hence the reduction in blog posts. I've discovered that I'm just brilliant at observations and character sketches and whatnot, but utter crap at plot. Eh, we'll see how it goes.

Also, I'm going to be on a (hopefully productive) vacation beginning Saturday, so don't expect any posts for a week. I know you were all waiting breathlessly for the next pearls of my wisdom, so I felt I should advise you not to hold your breath.

May 2, 2006

Drip, Drip, Drop

I want one of these cool jelly drop lights. No clue as to how much they'd cost, of course, but they're still pretty awesome. And, it seems, squishy. (Click on the quaintly titled "lightings" tab after entering the site.)

Peeing With the Fishes

You have to love any product called Aquariass. Even if it's kind of disconcerting to have fish watching you pee.

The Art of Lip-Synching

I know it's a few days old, but I only just got around to reading this very funny Slate article about YouTube, lip-synching, and some of the greatest lip-sync videos on the web. Dear lord, I love those two Chinese boys.

Apr 27, 2006

Light=Good. Candlewax=Bad.

Meant to mention these splash lights before, but got sidetracked. They seem like an awesome idea if you want some nice atmosphere in your pool (Ha! Don't I wish.) or your bathtub. And, as someone who has done the whole candles-on-the-edge-of-the-tub thing, which subsequently resulted in candlewax on the edge of the tub, I could definitely use a nonmessy yet decorative alternative light source.

Apr 26, 2006

Fugging Brilliant

At first I thought that the chicken soup was the highlight of my day. (It was the first solid food—other than Saltines—that I've eaten in days, as I'm getting over some wretched stomach virus.) But then I read this, and my day got even brighter.

Career Trajectory

Ah, how my career path has changed. Illustration 1: Excerpt from an earlier IM conversation:

Me: i can get packages, the whole copy desk is getting a bonus for working on an extra edition that we just did, i can take cabs on late nights and get them expensed, they'll pay for dinner if we have to stay late . . .
Me: it's like a real job!
Me: except, of course, that i'm editing articles about pwning n00bs in WOW
Matt: lol

What the World Needs Now...

Is chicken suits, sweet chicken suits. Now, if you were to ask me, I would say that clothing for chicken ranks low on the list of absolute necessities. But what do I know? I'm neither one of the Chinese investors nor Austrian inventors-cum-designers-cum-nutjobs that decided the world needed just such a thing. It came to them in a dream, it seems... Jeebus.

Apr 21, 2006

Castles in the Kitchen

I don't know why I'm on such a kitchen jag, but I seem to keep finding stuff that is cool and kitchen-related. My most recent discovery is this cute sandcastle Bundt cake pan, which was brought to my attention through the rather unconventional means of snail mail. (Yes, I get the Williams-Sonoma catalogue. No, I can't afford the products in it.) Just thought that it would be kinda cool to make a sandcastle-shaped cake for maybe a Fourth of July party or something. Not that I'm planning one.

Apr 20, 2006

Overheard Kerfuffle

Hm. It seems that there has been some kind of ouster at Overheard in New York. Former coeditor Michael Malice has departed and has since started a new (nearly identical) site called New York Overheard. Details are evidently forthcoming, but it doesn't sound pleasant. On the plus side, Malice will soon be launching Overheard at College, which should be a treasure trove of future goodies.

Apr 19, 2006

Little Things

Sometimes it doesn't take much to excite me. Case in point: these nifty "on the rocks" ice cube trays. $2.99 for a three-pack. Simple, really, but cool. (Literally--hah! I'm such a wit.)

Apr 18, 2006

Holy Blinging Lara Croft

Forgot to mention this before. I stumbled across one of the gaudiest (and rarest) gaming consoles ever. Some lucky(?) schmuck in Germany will win a crystal-encrusted XBox 360 as part of a Tomb Raider: Legends promo.

Apr 17, 2006


Oooh, I wish I'd gotten one of these jammies for Easter; I bet they don't ship well, though. I bet they'd look awesome painted, too.

Apr 12, 2006


This video of assorted clips of Japanese(?) Rube Goldberg machines is nuts. Nuts, man. Some of the contraptions are unbelievable. (And the song's quite catchy, too.)

PSA, Pirate-Style

So there's going to be a pirate party at Swarthmore. Nice, but no biggie. Here's the cool part: They're soliciting pirate-themed music videos. The Pirate Video Remix Contest ends April 21st, so get cracking, mateys.

Apr 11, 2006

Sweet as Shirley Temple Pudding

In case I haven't mentioned this before, I fucking love Veronica Mars. And Kristen Bell is so much more adorable in action than she is in photos. (Case in point: the not-so-hot Maxim spread.) However, she rocks as Veronica, was hysterical as Mary Lane in Reefer Madness, and may make the upcoming Pulse bearable.

Pulse (or Kairo), the original Japanese film by Kiyoshi Kurasawa came out--to a very limited US distribution--in 2001 and was awesome; it's now being remade. Let's hope they don't ruin it. Hopefully, Kristen Bell can work her little pixie magic on it. That twinkly minx.

Apr 7, 2006

Get Your Jamba On

Yay! Jamba Juice has introduced four new flavors. Thus far, I've had the Mega Mango, which is indeed mangoriffic. But the best part is that (in the San Francisco area, at least), they're giving away cards so that, if you buy four smoothies in the new flavors, you get the fifth free. Screw solid food, yo. Liquid lunches from now on!

Apr 5, 2006

Busy Bunnies

The 30-Second Bunnies Theatre Troupe has been busy, I must say. If you haven't checked out their library in a while, give it a look. The Brokeback Mountain reenactment is great, though I think my favorite is still The Shining.

Apr 3, 2006

Let There be Light(s)

Why is it so easy to find lighting fixtures that I want? Seriously, at one point in my life I had more lights than surfaces on which to display them. It's hard not to get carried away, innit?

New(ish) from Chiasso, here are two cool lighting fixtures: the sparkle table lamp and the agave lamp.

Holy Trompe l'Oeil, Batman!

These chalk sidewalk designs kick ass. Totally. Especially the last one.

Mar 31, 2006

Rich (Cuff) Stuff

These round and square cufflinks are pretty cool, yo. They remind me of the rich stuff that the Goonies found-- remember, Mikey filled his marble pouch with just this sort of jewel-toned glass. Ah, Mikey, you little scamp. Whoda thunk you'd go from hunting treasure to helping Master Frodo throw it into the fires of Mordor?

Like a Lawn for Your Front Stoop

It would feel more properly like spring if all the bloody rain would stop. Since there's no end in sight, maybe I should invest in one of these adorable daisy grass mats.

Mar 29, 2006

Back in the Kitchen

I know it's sorta silly, but I can't help but like this mermaid bottle opener (the translucent, iridescent redhead, not the glommy opaque blonde). It's niftier in person than in the photo, I promise. Still, it seems a bit extravagant to spend $20 (and to take up that much space) with a mere bottle opener.