Oct 31, 2006

The Ultimate Treat


The trick is—you're not getting it. Of course, neither am I. Happy Halloween anyway.

Oct 30, 2006

Time to Die

Okay, so this death's-head pocketwatch is a bit on the expensive side. But it's so deliciously macabre.

Oct 27, 2006

Mooning Over Jewelry

Ooh, I love this Smoon Bijou necklace. It looks like you're wearing the moon around your neck. So pretty.

Oct 25, 2006

Goatse: A Reminder

Warning: Neither safe for work nor for your own gag reflexes.

It had been a long, long time since I'd seen the original goatse, so I decided to inflict it on myself again, just as a refresher. Never ceases to amaze and disgust me. However, this tribute page cracks me up. Especially the best cake ever.

Oct 23, 2006

On Sexy Halloween Costumes: Follow-Up

Sometimes the Onion Radio News really hits the proverbial nail on the head. Case in point: Sexy Nurse Having Trouble Finding Halloween Costume.

Oct 19, 2006

On Sexy Halloween Costumes: A Parable

Leave it to the Times to publish a really useful article about Halloween costumes. Apparently, the Times asserts, there is an abundance, perhaps even an overabundance, of sexy Halloween costumes for women. To which I must respond: No shit?

To add my view to this vital issue, I must say that I have no problem with the entire sexy genre of costumes, only with the fact that so many of them are unoriginal. Whipping out your boobs and putting on a miniskirt is passé at this point. Still, the sheer volume (and I mean in number, not in the amount of fabric used) is a bit bothersome. When trawling the internet and physical costume shops in search of ideas for this year's costume, I did feel that, for all the variety, the choices were rather limited, as it was pretty difficult to find any ensembles that didn't leave the majority of one's body exposed to the elements.

In conclusion, I shall contribute my one sexy costume–related anecdote. Last year, my friend Anne and I were ambling through Ricky's shortly before Halloween. Naturally, there was a glut of costumes on display. We counted, among others, a naughty nurse, sexy secretary, foxy firefighter, porny policewoman, and even a brazen barista. Or a busty barista, if you prefer. Whatever. I'm making these names up as I go. In any event, Anne was most dismayed to see not a single racy doctor costume. (She's in med school and felt excluded, I assume.) We agreed that it was rather sexist to allow women to be all manner of scantily clad professionals (in addition to the usual array of flirty fairies, dirty devils, and wanton witches), but to deny the ladies the opportunity to dress like ethically questionable doctors. How misogynistic. Fortunately, this year I stumbled across a sexy surgeon costume. Now the balance has been redressed—skimpily, of course.

And Now, a Message From Our Sponsors

For a very long time, I could have used a feed aggregator. I just never thought to look for one. Now one has come to me: ajarr. Am a big fan, and not just because it's the brainchild of two dear friends. Though I'm sure that helps. Seriously, though, it's an awesome idea and already proving very useful, despite its status as pre-beta. Check it out.

While I'm pimping stuff, I might as well mention that Tully's pumpkin spice Bellaccino is delectable. And I don't have any connection to Tully's (except for spending too much money on coffee there lately), so this recommendation is totally nepotism-free. If you're in the Pacific Northwest, I strongly suggest you get one. It's orange, slushy, and is made with real pumpkin—what more do you want from a drink? Other than booze, you lushes.

Oct 17, 2006

Deadline (Again)

On deadline. Am always on deadline.

Oct 13, 2006

One-Stop Shopping for All Your Haunting Needs

Holy Great Pumpkin. If I were loaded, I would definitely have to place a few orders from The Scarefactory. I've always wanted to throw a Halloween party in a genuinely frightening setting, but most of my decorations are more of the cute and kitschy variety. But just imagine if I had guests walk through the corridor of corpses? Or if I set up one of these scary-ass animated characters (particularly the death statue or the scarionette)? Or any of this haunted furniture? My guests would piss themselves.

Oh. Maybe that's why I wouldn't decorate with these: too much cleanup.

Oct 12, 2006

South Park Takes on WoW

OMFG. South Park does WoW. There's a PK on the loose, ganking all the n00bs. But the boys decide it's time for some payback pwnage. LOL.

How sad is it that I understand what I just wrote? (Don't answer that.) Seriously, though, the episode is hy-freaking-sterical.

Oct 10, 2006

I Pwned Yo Mama

You'd have to be a pretty suave-ass motherfucker to pull off this shirt; it proclaims to all your videogame geekiness while throwing out a "yo mama" joke. Now that is classy. With a capital K. (Thanks for the heads-up, Zack.)

Fashion That Moves You...Er, Itself

I'm not a particular fan of most of the outfits in Hussein Chalayan's most recent collection, but check out these animatronic fashions. You should really watch this video of the show to see the clothes in action. (But mute your speakers; the soundtrack is horrendous.) Some seem awkward and gimmicky, but most of the animatronic designs look surprisingly wearable. And I totally want the hat, though I'd wear it with...well, something. Something other than nothing, unlike the poor nekkid model.

Oct 6, 2006

Cute 'n' Cuddly

Yeah, yeah, my posts lately have been sporadic. I've been busy, okay? With actual work, the writing of short stories, and the newly discovered art of crafting jewelry from Shrinky-Dinks. (I tied up the office toaster oven for much of Tuesday.)

Anyway, for a cute and cuddly weekend, check out the adorable teensy-weensy needled felt animals in Making Mitsi's Etsy shop. (I could do without the accessories, but the little animals are adorable.)

Oct 4, 2006

Hardcore Pumpkins

For some truly macabre pumpkin carving awesomeness, take a gander here. It's extreme...TO THE MAX! (Thanks, Zack.)

Get Your Pumpkin Carving Tools Ready

Because the Flying Spaghetti Monster Pumpkin Contest 2006 is on!

Oct 3, 2006

Karaoke on the Go

This could be a terribly dangerous idea for all us closet karaokers: the iKaraoke. Could make for some fun drunken karaoke parties. (Are there really any other kind?)

Overheard Right Outside Our Damn Window

For some reason, every drunken college student, homeless can collector, stoned hippie, and general crackpot in Berkeley chooses to argue/protest/sing/piss in front of our apartment. I don't know why; we're just lucky, I guess. So tonight a rather naggish chick and a guy who sounded like Walter Brennan decided to have their very loud, very personal conversation outside our window.

Some highlights:
Woman: Everyone thinks I'm the richest woman in Berkeley. I'm not; I'm the poorest woman in Berkeley!

A few unintelligible seconds later, she continued:
I'm going to lose my house!

(Hm, she has a house. That probably makes her better off than I am.)
And another point in her litany of complaints:
I don't want to, but I have to pay someone to clean the bathroom! I don't want to, but I have to pay someone to clean the pool!

Stupefying, no?